Brain Bleach Awards

Come one and come all to the first ever Brain Bleach Awards here at Video Roulette.

Now, I know time and again I have mentioned the use of something called "brain bleach". Well, it's not videos that cleanse the mind.

This is a term that my dear friend Cinema Chick and I came up with randomly when we have seen something we wish we hadn't and want to cleanse our minds with bleach, thus brain bleach.

Everyone has seen an image, heard a song, or seen a video that they wish they could unsee.

Well, I polled all of my close friends the Cinema Chick, Jaysen, Talkc, and Larry to come up with their candidates for a brain bleach worthy video. I added my own submission and now I have the top five most brain bleach worthy videos.

Prepare yourselves for the horror that only YouTube can provide.

As always the fifth video will be the least offensive while the first makes my brain want to leak out of my ears.

Number 5

Mundo Canibal Podre Shop Nova Geração

This video was shown to me by Jaysen and I honestly was utterly silent as I watched every second of this video. This was mostly due to the fact it's not in English. We presume it's the Portuguese form of Spanish which neither of us knows completely. That's pretty much the only reason it's not higher on the list. A lot of the characters in the video are well enough known by me but some of the jokes are lost simply by not speaking the same language. In retrospect, this might be a good thing.

Number 4

きゃりーぱみゅぱみゅ - PONPONPON , Kyary Pamyu Pamyu

I internally debated about the two videos I was thinking about placing at the Number 4 spot. In the end, the video shown to me by Larry was actually less brain bleach worthy than the other one. Again, this is a video that's not in English...obviously. However, I do watch a lot of videos from this part of the world with interest. Honestly, some of them are pretty good. But this video...um wow. Pretty much every person I asked for a video asked if this one was on my brain bleach list.

I sat watching this video and while the song isn't something I latched onto, the visuals offered me made me wonder about the people that made the video. A brain floating in the window bobbing to the music? What's with the large person in yellow dancing about? Wait, now it's a green turtle spinning slowly? I'm so confused.

Number 3

Undimmed By Anime Tears a 9/11 Memorial Tribute

The tragedies of 9/11 affected every person a different way. Some wailed, some grieved silently, some took to action, and some prayed. Numerous videos can be found on the subject of what happened on 9/11. Many are news casts of that fateful day while others are tearful memorials to the lives of those lost...

Then some people made theirs while on crack and watching anime. I mean...WTF?! Really??? The descriptions says it was meant seriously yet...anime? Really? I get the concept, I really do; however, I would almost had preferred it if they were just joking and did this in sarcasm in response to some really insensitive video made by someone else. The best reaction was had by Jaysen who upon watching the video immediately removed the video from his entire internet history and set to watch videos of kittens. *Shudders* I can never unsee this and it's only going to get worse.

Number 2

Video WTF Of The Week

Now...far be it from me to say what's art and what's not...but I can honestly say I will never view art the same way again. I saw this video ages ago and knew it was a prime candidate for my brain bleach awards. I just...I...there are no words to describe how badly I don't want know this exists let alone see the full version everyone claims is out there.

Despite my best efforts to come up with a truly horrendous video...I am outshined by the Cinema Chick in this regard today.

Number 1

My anus is bleeding.

There are not so many times where I discover the source of a phrase and promptly want to gouge my own eyes out. Unfortunately, this became one of them.

I had heard this phrase said various times by friends and all over SecondLife. While I never really wanted to know the source of something as gag reflex inducing as someone's anus bleeding, I couldn't help but wonder how it became so popular.

The Cinema Chick was "kind" enough to introduce me to this video being the source for future generations to view and quote constantly and unironically to friends and family members. My mind was utterly blank as I watched this little puff ball/cloud/soot ball/whatever speaking in a high pitched voice before his/her (?) anus begins to bleed while other little identical critters cheer and dance like they are on acid. Maybe that's why this video was created. Someone did a shit load of acid and right before they died they created this.

Oh lord, the amount of brain bleach I want to erase this from my mind isn't known by any current standard of measurement.

With that last video finally done, I can go crawl into a corner and twitch uncontrollably till the last remnant of these videos passes out of thought and mind.

I'm just glad it's over...for now. As long as YouTube exists, more videos will appear and another day will see the next chapter of brain bleach worthy material. I hope for my sake I have recovered enough by then to tackle such a feat again.

I'm Creative Karma here at Video Roulette and I think I might have to lie down very still for a long while.